“Parenting is the easiest thing in the world to have an opinion about, but the hardest thing in the world to do.” — Matt Walsh.
Sometimes, it feels that we parents, especially mothers, are under constant surveillance by the people around us and society. The performance pressure, being good parents, bad parenting decisions, busy parents are some of the very common comments from our audience!.
Parenting is not easy! That’s the truth. Since we have chosen to become parents, we can’t back off from the responsibility once we become parents as it involves a tiny human being who trusts, loves, and whose entire world revolves around us!. No one is here to fail you in any parenting exams except yourself, if you think so. You are doing your best. You are the Best!
Here are some tips which I discovered during my parenting journey.
Trust Your Instinct and Your Child
You are the parents and know what’s best for your child. If you don’t know, seek suggestions and decide for yourselves. You should have the openness and curiosity to learn new things. Be open-minded to trust your instincts and your child’s, and thus, you hold control of your life, not others.
Be Kind to Yourself
Don’t be so harsh and judgmental on yourself. You became a parent for the first time when your child was born, and you are also learning the process of parenting, which is a 24-hour duty. It’s Okay to be Not Okay. Be open-minded to yourself by loving yourself with all your faults and positives.
Seek Support
In this modern world where everyone lives in their tiny world, parenting becomes tougher each day. ‘It takes a village to raise a child’ is an old African proverb which assures that it’s not natural and almost impossible for parents to provide a healthy and nurturing environment for the child to thrive, all alone. Parents must be connected with similar communities and take turns caring for children. It actually does wonders for your and your child’s emotional and physical well-being. Be open-minded to seek help from other parenting communities and friends.
Be Courageous to Deal with Your Inner Child Healing and Traumas
This is an important aspect of parenting. Take responsibility for your own lives and decide not to pass on intergenerational traumas to your child. We might be carrying many of our childhood traumas and stress (that’s what makes you human), be aware of it, and don’t try to ‘manage’ it somehow. Your child deserves healthy parents both physically and mentally more than flashy dresses, branded shoes, junk foods, foreign tours, etc. Be open-minded to seek psychological help and counseling.
Admit Your Mistakes and Limitations to Your Child
Be honest with your child about the parenting mistakes you commit. Children are the most empathetic and compassionate beings in this whole world. You might get a hug and kiss from your little one saying, ‘Amma/Acha, it’s okay, don’t worry, let’s try once again!’.
Take Control of Your Parenting, Be a Friendly Parent
Please don’t be a friend to your child, but be a friendly parent. A friendly parent is the one who is in control of the child’s life. A friendly parent sets clear expectations and boundaries, is warm and responsive, encourages independence, fosters open communication, uses positive discipline, and is a role model.
Suggested Reading: SPED Kid: Know to Help Your Kid – What Parents Need to Know
Conclusion
Parenting is undeniably challenging, filled with moments of self-doubt and societal pressure. However, by trusting your instincts, being kind to yourself, seeking support, addressing personal traumas, admitting mistakes, and taking a balanced approach to parenting, you can navigate this journey with more confidence and compassion. You are doing your best, and that makes you the best parent your child could have.
Adv. Meera Balakrishnan
